Going to the Beach
Situation: It’s a gorgeous summer Saturday, and you and some friends decide to spend it on the beach.
IF THIS WAS NEW YORK: It’s common to bring a book to the beach, but you bring two because you know you’re going to need one for the 2+ hour trek on the subway to get there and back. Once you arrive at Coney Island, you fight the crowds to get to the boardwalk.
Once on the boardwalk, you see a guy carrying several parrots and a giant snake. You make eye contact with him, which is his signal to drape the snake around your neck and demand $5 for the act. You give him the money out of gratitude for taking the snake back.
You walk until you see a less crowded section of the beach. You set out your blankets, being careful to remove any shards of glass or needles in the area, and make sure there’s no one in your general vicinity doing something weird or showing an inappropriate number of body parts.
You take a stab at going into the water. You can’t tell if the water looks dirty of if it has just been a long time since you’ve been to the ocean. Even though it’s a hot day, the water is still uncomfortably cold. You head back to your blanket instead. You and a friend take a shot at playing frisbee, but there are so many people around, every other throw results in a small child getting hit in the head or running into a guy fifteen times your size.
After several hours, you head back towards the subway, stopping to get a hot dog and funnel cake. The fried-food induced coma makes the two hour subway ride back pass in minutes.
The only other time you have been to Coney Island: You feel asleep on the train and wake up there at 3 AM in February. You stand on the platform for twenty minutes waiting to board a train back to Manhattan. You nearly get frostbite.
Image by jmehre on Flickr
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